Part one of a woman’s journey in the discovery of BDSM.
The mirror is filled with the bordeaux red of my graduation dress, which has only seen the inside of my closet for the last ten years. By now it makes sense why my mother told me the dress was too voluptuous for the occasion of a graduation. Considering the reason I am wearing it now, she was probably right. I step closer to my reflection to inspect my blue eyes, that due to the surrounding makeup send out an invitation to dive into them. While staring into my eyes I bring up an expensive mask to my face, but just when it is about to touch my skin, the vibration of my phone interrups me. 52.572491, 13.690550, is all the message contains and without giving it much further thought I order a taxi. “Going to a party?”, the driver asks me half way through the journey. “Sort of”, I answer shortly to avoid any further inquiries and immediately stare back out of the window.
The view has gradually changed from the excitement of the city into the serenity of the woods and has filled me with tranquility that be short lasted. When the sound of asphalt is being exchanged by the sound of gravel, the vehicle loses velocity until there is no sound at all. “This is it”, the driver says, while I take in the enormous mansion surrounded by darkness and intimidating tall trees, almost hiding it. My high heels transform the gravel into quicksand when I move towards the equally enormous gate and immediately grab hold of two of the bars for more stability. During my inspection of the exterior of the building from behind the gate, I hear the taxi returning to the city, leaving me alone with the sound of my breathing. Suddenly the gate slowly opens and insistently pulls me onto the estate. I seize the momentum of the pull and push myself mentally towards the front door.
A golden tray filled with champagne glasses is being held in front of me by a woman wearing nothing more than black heels, a black thong and a mask with large black feathers.
The door gets opened by a servant with a plain white mask. “Can I please see your invitation?”, he says in a single tone of voice. As demanded I show him the message containing the coordinates of where we currently are and get gestured inside. Instantly it feels like I am in a different world. I am standing in the entrance hall build of dark grey marble and triple the size of my whole apartment. I put the mask up to my face and attach it with a double knot, before I move to the open door in between two angelic white statues. The sound of my heels on the hard floor echoes through the space and I enjoy the predictable support I lacked outside.
The room is filled with an anonymous crowd of well-dressed people wearing various kinds of masks. They are having conversations as if it was a customary occasion. A golden tray filled with champagne glasses is being held in front of me by a woman wearing nothing more than black heels, a black thong and a mask with large black feathers. She does not say a word when my eyes slowly wander up and down her body that looks like it has been designed by God himself. Quickly I take a glass from her tray and let the cold champagne flow into my mouth until it is half empty. Aimlessly I walk through the room and look at the paintings that show the only faces without masks. “First time?”, I suddenly hear next to me, hoping it was not meant for me. A man with a fully masked face looks at me with cheerful eyes that imply a big smile hidden under his mask. “Is it that obvious?”, I answer slightly disappointed. “Well, I kind of made a sport of spotting the first-timers. Let me show you around. This is the least exciting room”, he says and holds up his elbow like a gentleman. Since I have no idea what I am doing, I decide to take him up on his offer. “Is that some kind of niche fetish?”, I joke when we walk in the direction of another room. “I love first impressions. It always reminds me of the feeling when I did something for the first time”, he says laughing.
We are standing at the edge of the room, still I can smell their sweat filled with sex pheromones diffusing into the air.
When we enter the room the whole atmosphere changes and the lights are dimmer. The attention of those present is focus on a large wooden table in the middle of the room. The table has lost its dining function and is now acting as a stage on which a man and a woman are passionately having sex as if they were in the comfort of their own bedroom. The woman is on her hands and knees being penetrated from behind, while she deeply looks into the eyes of the man sitting at the table in front of her. We are standing at the edge of the room, still I can smell their sweat filled with sex pheromones diffusing into the air. The whole setting is so calm and quiet that I wonder if people are actually aroused. “Let’s move on”, my guide says and we leisurely walk out of the room into a long corridor decorated with pornographic renaissance paintings. We encounter another half-naked woman serving champagne and swap in our empty glasses for full ones. She could have been the body-twin of the other woman and I realize everything here has been planned into perfection.
“Do you know any of these people?”, I ask. “I try to forget everything I know when I am here. Everyone can be who they wish to be. Most of these people don’t have that luxury in their everyday lives. Too rich, too important or even too famous”, he explains. We emerge from the corridor and I have no time to ponder over this information. I get overwhelmed with a vast amount of naked people, who are entangled with each other in various positions. Right next to us a man is sitting on a chair smoking a cigar, while his penis has completely vanished into the mouth of the woman kneeling in front of him. Suddenly he grabs a bottle of whisky from the side table next to him and pours it over his chest. Instantaneously two other women march over to him and start licking the whisky off his body as quickly as humanly possible. Saving him from potential disaster. My eyes are wide open and start to wander around the prodigious room.
“Can I do anything to make the two of you happy?”, she asked seductively.
Under the big chandelier in the middle of the room a standing soixante-neuf position is being performed and I cannot help to be impressed. We are not the only ones watching the acrobatics. A woman leaning against one of the four pillars holding up the high ceiling of the room, is intensely masturbating with both hands, while watching them closely. Loud, almost painful moans enter my ear and I scan the area to find their origin. I become witness to an older woman being fucked by two muscular men simultaneously and I try to imagine her in suit, giving a presentation about stock trading. On the ground next to them a pile of women is moving like snake over and under each other, touching and kissing every body part they come across of. When I look closer I see the back of one of the women is covered in bite marks. Suddenly a warm hand is placed on my shoulder and a woman wearing an evil-looking mask slowly circles in front of us.
“Can I do anything to make the two of you happy?”, she asked seductively. I freeze and tighten my grip around the arm I have not let go of once. “We are good for now. Thank you, love”, my guide says politely. She shrugs almost in slow motion, elegantly walks away from us and vanishes into another room. When she is out of sight my imagination runs wild about all the possible ways I could have answered her question and wish I had the courage to react differently. “How many rooms are there?”, I ask at the same instance the wonder appears in my head. “Enough to fulfil all of your fantasies. I can take you deeper down the rabbit hole”, he says before letting the cold lips of his mask touch my bare cheek. I can sense he is aroused by my innocence, surely a rarity in this place.
To be continued…